Sweeney The Unicorn
by TheyAllDeserveToDie
Summary: Sweeney wakes up to find himself in the world of Charlie the Unicorn. Read to find out his reactions. Based on the Youtube video 'Charlie the Unicorn', but you don't have to have seen it to find this funny. I know that there is more than one Charlie the unicorn video, but I think that this is a one-shot because I'm lazy. No seriousness in this FanFic at all.


**Hello, again! This is an old FanFic which I decided to rewrite.. Yeh..**

**It's based off of the Youtube video 'Charlie the Unicorn'. I suggest that you go and watch it, but you don't have to have seen it to understand this, I don't think. it will still hopefully be funny.**

**Yeah, it's short, but the Youtube video's short.**

**This is just for a bit of fun.. No seriousness at all.**

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Sweeney woke up. He couldn't even remember falling to sleep in the first place. He could remember cleaning his razors one by one, and then just complete darkness. It seemed like he was laying on grass. Had he been knocked out?  
"Hey, hey Sweeney, hey, Sweeney wake up!" Came an annoying voice from above the barber.  
"Yeah, Sweeney. You silly sleepy head, wake up!" Came another equally annoying voice.  
Sweeney groaned at how annoying the voices where. He didn't recognise them. He slowly opened his eyes, cautiously. It took his eyes a few seconds to adjust to the brightness of the new environment.  
He looked up, taking a while to finally realise what was leaning down over him.  
''What? Unicorns? Where the hell am I?'' He looked around, achonowledging that he was in a bright, green meadow. Trees everywere. It was a lot brighter than London, and it looked as if he was in a cartoon. There were two unicorns. One was pink, and one was blue. They both looked a bit crazed.  
"Am I having a nightmare?" He asked himself out loud, rubbing his temples. He didn't understand what was going on.  
"No, Sweeney! We found a map, to Candy Mountain. Candy Mountain, Sweeney!" Exclaimed the blue unicorn.  
"Yeah, Sweeney! We're going to Candy Mountain. Come with us, Sweeney," the pink unicorn also exclaimed.  
"Yeah, Sweeney! It will be an adventure, Sweeney. We're going on an adventure, Sweeney!"  
How did they know his name? He started to panic. Candy Mountain? That sounded horrible. He pinched himself- nope! This was all real.  
"Mrs Lovett? Toby? Is this some kind of trick? I'm going back to sleep, now," he said, pretty sure it was Mrs Lovett and Toby pulling a practical joke and hoping that when he woke up everything would be back to normal. The unicorns just sounded so... annoying. They sort of dragged their words, and their voices were higher than a normal voice.  
"Noooooo! Sweeney! You have to come with us, to Candy Mountin!" Cried the blue unicorn, jumping on Sweeneys back, repeatitively.  
"Yeah, Sweeney! Candy Mountain! It's the land of sweets, and joy, and joyness," cried the other unicorn. Sweets? Joy? None of them things sounded pleasant at all.  
"What the hell are you talking about? I know you're playing a trick on me... And, please stop bouncing on me!" "Candy Mountain, Sweeney!"  
"Yeah, Candy Mountain!" Sweeney was downright aggravated. They were so annoying! Why were they so bothered about going to a stupid place called 'Candy Mountain'? There was only one way to stop them going on about it.  
"Fine! I'll fricken' go with you to fricken' Candy Mountain!" He knew there wasn't an actual Candy Mountain- but he may as well go.  
He found himself walking through a forest, the two unicorns leading the way. "La la la la la la!" The unicorns chimed, in unison. Sweeney groaned.  
"Enough with the singing, already!" He yelled, clutching at his razor. He considered slitting their throats, but then he might not be able to get back.  
"Our first stop is over there, Sweeney!" Came the purple unicorn. Sweeney lifted his head, and right infront of him was some sort of... monster! It was sprawled out on it's stomach. It was orange, with dark purple stripes, it also had four flippery things.  
"Oh, god! What is that?" He couldn't believe what he was seeing.  
"It's a leopleuradon, Sweeney."  
"A magical leopleuradon!"  
"It's gonna guide our way to Candy Mountain!"  
"THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS FRICKIN' CANDY MOUNTAIN!" Sweeney shouted, swinging out his razor.  
"Shone the none believer!" Said the blue one, ignoring his razor.  
"Shone!" Said the pink one.  
"Shoooooooooonee!" Came the blue one, again.  
Sweeney grunted in frustration. Why didn't they look threatened? He put his razor back. It's not everyday you see unicorns, anyway. This could actually be interesting.  
"Eeerm, yeah," said Sweeney, as the 'leopleuradon', or whatever it was made a loud, random screech. It pained his ears.  
"It has spoken!"  
"It has told us the way!"  
"It didn't say anything," Sweeney pointed out, gritting his teeth. God, and he thought Toby was annoying!  
"It's just over that bridge, Sweeney!" The blue one said, leading the way onto a long, rickety bridge, "this magical bridge, of hope and wonder!"  
"We shouldn't be on this thing! Is this safe? " He asked, as he carefully started to walk across the bridge. It was rocking, dangerously. "Sweeeneeeey! Sweeeneeeeey! Sweeeeeeneeeeeeeeeeey! Sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeneeen-"  
"Yes? What do you want?"  
There was a pause.  
"We're on a bridge, Sweeney!" One of the unicorns grinned, leading them off of the bridge.  
"Wow, there actually is a Candy Mountain!" He frowned at the colourfulness. A medium size, lopsided mountain made from every sweet you could think of towered above them. A large banner was hung above a doorway on the front of it, reading: 'Candy Mountain'. He peered inside the doorway. It was just darkness. This place gave him the creeps. He didn't like colour, unicorns, or candy. This was all to weird!  
"Candy Mountain! Candy Montain! You fill me with sweet, sugary goodness!" The blue unicorn sang, as it seemed to fly around the Mountain and back again. A shiver ran down Sweeney's spine.  
"Go inside the Candy Mountain cave, Sweeney"  
"Yeah, Sweeney. Go inside the cave! Magical wonders that behold when you enter!"  
"No!" He shouted. Why the hell would he go into a dark cave, made of freakin' candy? He was Sweeney Todd, for goodness sake!  
"But you have to enter the Candy Mountain Candy Cave, Sweeney!"  
Sweeney could hear music. Suddenly, the letters on the sign that read 'Candy' came to life. What was happening to him? Oh no, the letters were singing!  
"Oh when you're down and looking for some cheering up Then just head right on up to the candy mountain cave When you get inside you'll find yourself a cheery land Such a happy and joy filled and perky merry land They've got lollipops and gummidrops and candy things Oh so many things that will brighten up your day Its impossible to wear a frown in candy town Its the mecca of love the candy cave They've got jellybeans and coconuts with little hats Candy rats, chocolate bats, its a wonderland of sweets Ride the candy train to town and hear the candy band Candy bells, its a treat, as they march across the land Cherry ribbons stream across the sky and to the ground Turn around, it astounds, its a dancing candy tree In the candy cave imagination runs so free So now Sweeney please will you go into the cave?" The letters sang, dancing around before finishing with a massive explosion.  
"What's happening to me?" He was actually thinking about slitting his own throat. The unicorns stared at him.  
"Ok! I'll go into the freakin' candy cave! This better be goddamn good!" He shouted, striding into the cave as confidently as he could. He couldn't see anything at all apart from the unicorns stood outside of the door.  
Both of the unicorns laughed.  
"Goodbye, Sweeney!"  
"Yeah, goodbye, Sweeney!"  
"Goodbye? What?" He panicked, but before he had chance to do anything, the door closed.  
"Hey, what's going on?" He called to where the door was. He heared footsteps, and then the echo of the unicorn's voices. "Sweeeeeeney! Sweeeeeeney! Sweeeeeeeeeney!"

He woke up. Mrs Lovett was leaning over his bed, frowning.  
"Wha.. What happened?" He asked, puzzled.  
"Well, I 'eard you shoutin' so I came up," she answered.  
"Erm... ok," he replied. He slightly blushed at the thought of himself shouting in his sleep. He must have looked stupid...  
"Mr T? Are you alrigh'?" She asked, frowning even more.  
"Yeh, whatever. Leave me,'' he told her.  
She shrugged and left the room.  
Sweeney couldn't concentrate on his work all day. The only thing he could hear was;  
"Sweeeeneeeeeey! Sweeeeeeeneeeeey! Sweeeeeeeneeeeeeeeey! Sweeeeeeneeeeeeeeey! Sweeeeeeeeeneeeeeeeeeey!"

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**Thanks for reading. Please Review? Thanks..**


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